“YANG KURIK KUNDI, YANG MERAH SAGA....”
(Note: I wrote and published this article elsewhere some time back, but thought it would be OK to recycle it here.)
A few weeks ago, my colleagues and I attended a three-day course to improve on our understanding, command and usage of Bahasa Melayu so that we could communicate more effectively and efficiently in the national language. For me, it was certainly a process of re-discovering and re-appreciating the strength, beauty and adaptability of the language, which has been the lingua franca of the Malay Archipelago since centuries ago. After all, the last formal training I had -- if you could call that “training” – on my mother tongue was in secondary school. And you would agree with me that we were not taught much then. Whatever little we had learnt, I’m pretty sure we have forgotten, anyway.
During the three-day course, we were exposed to many different aspects of the language, including the national policy on Bahasa Melayu and the policy’s implementation, the language’s functions, its evolution, as well as aspects on grammar and spelling. There was also a module on kesantunan berbahasa, or the gracefulness of and correctness in using the language, in our day-to-day communication and interaction. In fact, the course facilitator dedicated one whole day to discussions on this aspect of the language, and how it builds, forms and shapes our social system, our values, our social etiquette, our character and so forth. I always have a particularly keen interest in this subject and its relation to the Malay kesopanan dan kesusilaan as well as to the universal code of etiquette.
In the Malay community, the norms and messages of the Malay etiquette are manifested in thousands of pantun, proverbs, adages and idioms. But sometimes, the deeper meaning of a pantun or a proverb is lost on us because we do not really understand how or why that particular pantun or proverb was coined, and why certain words or phrases were used. In a pantun, for example, each of the words and phrases, even those in the first two lines of the quatrain, is carefully chosen and carries a significant meaning. Yes, the words and phrases are there not just to rhyme. And most traditional pantun contain much wisdom to guide us in almost all aspects of our life. Just like the concept behind kesantunan berbahasa reminds us of who we are, where we come from, where we are (or should be) going, and how we should get there. Such is the beauty, the richness and the refinement of Bahasa Melayu.
Yang kurik kundi,
Yang merah saga;
Yang baik budi,
Yang indah bahasa.
Of course, as we evolve and change with the time, as does the language, we do not pay much attention to its beauty, richness and refinement. Heck, we don’t even understand certain words or phrases, let alone try to fathom their deeper meaning or significance. And we wonder why there are so many individuals out there in the society who lack budi bahasa or budi pekerti, or both.
Which reminds me of a little conversation I had the other day with a couple of instructors at my fitness club. Apparently they were – they still are -- at their wits’ end on how to handle this particular member who seems to have ditched all tenets of kesopanan dan kesusilaan in her interaction with staff of the club. According to the instructors, they have also received verbal complaints about her from other members of the club. “Rude”, “loud”, “sarcastic”, and “caustic” are just some of the favourite adjectives they closely associated with her. I, too, had had the displeasure of interacting with her, when she decided to bulldoze her way into a conversation that she was never a part of in the first place. And the remark that she passed was downright rude and uncalled for. Her incessant chatter, and always about herself, drive some members of the gym up the wall. Nowadays, I steer away from her whenever I see her in the club. I am also considering wearing a pair of really effective earplugs.
Tingkap papan kayu bersegi,
Sampan sakat di Pulau Angsa;
Indah tampan kerana budi,
Tinggi bangsa kerana bahasa.
I suppose we can never stress enough on the importance of budi bahasa and budi pekerti as they say a lot about a person. I’m not sure whether people still do this, but when I was growing up, my parents and relatives were always reminding me to “bawa diri baik-baik” whenever I returned to school after term breaks, or before I left home for extended visits somewhere. Even when I was in university, letters I received from home always ended with the phrase, or its variations. Although short, it went a long way in reminding me of how I should behave and carry myself wherever I was. It still works for me, and it has become my own favourite piece of advice.
Now, I wonder whether anyone has ever told our good friend at the gym to “bawa diri baik-baik”, but the next time she steps on my toe, I’m just going to look squarely at her in the face and say, “Yang kurik kundi, yang merah saga….”, and hope that she’d get it. If that fails, I’d go the whole hog with this lightly veiled threat:
Ubi keledek dibuat pengat,
Mari dimakan di bulan puasa;
Wahai cik adik hendaklah ingat,
Kerana mulut badan binasa.
ESCAPING CLUELESSNESS
I read with with interest recent news reports about Malaysians' reading habit, which is virtually non-existent. According to the reports, a survey found that 98% of Malaysian children read only two books a year. I guess it was this very shameful fact that had led the authorities to launch the annual National Reading Campaign, with plans to spend a whopping RM10 million a year for the next five years.
Yup. Yet another noble (debatable) effort by our government. I just can't wait to see the campaign's outcome. If it turns out to be a success, well and good. If not, the government can always say: Well, we tried.
Personally, I'm not quite sure how this habit could be cultivated. It's either you love reading, or you don't. Plus, there are so many distractions nowadays.
When I was a child in primary school, books were my only source of pleasure. We were so poor we did not have a TV, and the radio made its debut in our home when I was nearly 12 years old! My mother bought our first TV (she said she wanted to wait for colour TV) when I was 16 or 17.
So, I buried myself in books. My favourites were those Enid Blyton novels -- the Famous Five series -- I found in the school library. I remember finishing all the books in the series in less than a month.
My eldest sister was a bit worried, because she felt Ms Blyton's books had no real literary value. So to please her, I started reading all those novels by the late Hamka, arguably one of the most prolific of Indonesian writers, and books by Malaysian novelists like A. Samad Said, Shahnon Ahmad and the like. My sister also introduced me to the (translated) works of Rabindranath Tagore, India's Nobel laureate poet and writer. And all this while I was still in primary school!
When I got to secondary school, my staple read included classic works of Dickens, the Brontë sisters, Steinbeck, Hemingway, Melville, du Maurier, de Maupassant etc. My all time favourites were Harper Lee's To Kill a Mocking Bird (I think I must have read it 36 times, or more!!) and Margaret Mitchell's Gone with the Wind (I finished it in three days during a term break -- my mom threatened to consult a bomoh as I refused to put down the book even at meal times), and I read it again and again for a total of not less than 15 times.
But that was just me. I just loved reading. I still do, except that now I don't have the luxury of time to read a lot. But I still make it a habit to buy at least one book every time I go to the book store with my twin godsons, who just love book stores! Now, if only I could get them to love reading as much....
I'm not sure what the government wants to do with the proposed annual budget of RM10 million for the reading campaign. My suggestion is to stock school libraries, especially primary and secondary schools, with really good books, and not just those meant to help students pass their exams.
Which brings me to another point I'm trying to make. It seems that nowadays reading is only for passing exams, for finishing class assignments.
It's no longer for pleasure, no longer for discovery purposes, no longer for opening of the mind and imagination, no longer for moulding character and values. Especially among my Malay brethrens.
Opps. They do read for pleasure, but their top choice reading materials would be those gossip rags, and gossip rags only (how would you explain the staying power of URTV, and the sister rag Mangga?).
So, how to mould character and values like that? How to get them to discover knowledge, how to open up their minds and imagination, how to get them get over their ignorance and cluelessness?
On any weekend, if you go to the book stores, you'd hardly see any Malay people with their kids there. You go to Malay homes, how many would have a library or at least reading corner? Macamana nak terus maju?
So, rajin-rajinlah membaca, jangan terus hanyut dalam kejahilan minda. Ewahh.
MALAYSIANS ARE NOT RUDE
Like the majority of Malaysians, I totally disagree with the recent findings of a survey published by the Reader's Digest that placed Kuala Lumpur the third rudest city in the world.
Why do I disagree, you ask? Well, I disagree because I have proof that Malaysians are not like that at all. We are all such refined ladies and gentlemen. Kita kaya dengan budi bahasa, kita bangsa bertimbang rasa. We are all very considerate. The following observation proves my point:
- Malaysians ALWAYS say "Thank you" and "You are welcome" when other people do something nice for them. The most excellent examples are the sales people in our shopping malls. They are SO polite and DO NOT snigger at you even when you do not buy anything at their shops. Same thing goes to our toll booth operators. They smile and thank you ALL the time after collecting your money. And those waiters and waitresses, they are ALL gems, our little ambassadors of politeness and good manners.
- Malaysian drivers NEVER cut queues, especially during horrendous traffic congestion. Everyone will wait patiently for his/her turn. They NEVER, EVER use emergency lanes to cilok.They ALWAYS give way to other drivers who signal to change lanes. And they ALWAYS use their indicators when they want to turn. Their indicators are NOT for decoration only. They ALWAYS give way to pedestrians at zebra crossings. Slow drivers NEVER hog the fast lanes. Malaysian drivers ALWAYS adhere to speed limit, and they ALWAYS pay their speeding tickets or fines on time.
- Malaysians ALWAYS open doors, or hold open the doors for other people, especially for ladies and old people, or people with babies or small children, or people with lots of things in their arms/hands. They NEVER let the doors slam into these people's faces.
- Malaysians NEVER spit in public, in the elevators, or on the road while stuck in traffic jam. They also NEVER pick their noses or ears in the car while stuck in traffic jam.
- Malaysians ALWAYS dispose of their rubbish properly. They NEVER while driving wind down their car window and chuck out fruit peels, plastic wraps, tissue paper, drink cans, cigarette butts, empty mineral bottles etc. And these things NEVER hit the car or cars behind them. And if they live in high-rises, they will NEVER, EVER throw garbage out of their windows, especially things that could potentially hurt somebody down below.
- Malaysians also ALWAYS pick up things they drop, especially if these are the things that should go in the trash bin. And when they knock into something in a shop, they will ALWAYS pick that something up and put it back in its proper place.
- Malaysians ALWAYS smile back and ALWAYS warmly respond to greetings from airline crew when they fly. When people smile or greet them, Malaysians NEVER think that they are being hit upon.
- Malaysians NEVER rush into elevators. They ALWAYS wait for those passengers already in the elevators to come out first before they enter. And when using escalators, they NEVER stand side by side with their friend(s) on the escalator, but will ALWAYS let other people who are in a hurry to pass.
- Malaysian taxi drivers are ALWAYS honest. They ALWAYS use their metres and NEVER try to cheat or over charge their passengers, especially if the passengers are foreigners.
- Malaysians ALWAYS have impeccable table manners. They NEVER overstuff their plates at the buffet line. They NEVER speak with their mouths full. They NEVER spit out chicken bones onto the dining table, and they NEVER drink their soup with a straw. Eh, no, I'm confused. It's Singaporeans who NEVER drink their soup with a straw.
- Malaysian Muslims ALWAYS think of their Hindu brethrens when they invite them to their parties and NEVER serve beef at the parties, much like the non-Muslims who NEVER serve pork at parties they invite their Muslim friends to.
- Malaysian traders at China Town or Chow Kit are ALL so very, very polite, they NEVER curse at you or call you horrible names if you don't buy their imitation goods.
- Malaysians NEVER talk in the cinema during a movie. They ALWAYS switch off their cellphones and NEVER take calls. And if they accidentally do, they ALWAYS stop when fellow cinema-goers ask them to. They also NEVER leave behind garbage -- popcorn tubs, paper cups, etc -- after a movie.
- Malaysians NEVER bring their domestic help or maids to parties at friends', especially when they know that the parties are meant for, well, friends. And ALL Malaysians who have maids treat their maids very well. They NEVER abuse them, pour hot water on them, and NEVER, EVER hit them with hot iron.
- Malaysians NEVER bring durians into hotels or into any other buildings, for fear that other guests or their colleagues would suffer migraines or nausea upon smelling the fruit's wonderful and universally loved aroma. They ALWAYS adhere to signs at buildings that prohibit the fruit.
- Malaysians ALWAYS queue up properly at train stations or bus stops. They NEVER fight for seats and ALWAYS give up the seats to the elderly, pregnant ladies, handicapped OKUs, especially if these seats ARE already meant and marked for these people.
Well, these are some of the proof (and the list does not end here), mainly from personal observation, that I could think of. So, they prove that Malaysians are NOT rude.
Right.
IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST. REALLY.
Well, it's now officially splitsville between a certain SMS King and his (ex-) would-be Queen. What a sad end to perhaps the most scrutinised relationship in Malaya's recent history.
And bravo to the mainstream and tabloid reporters who relentlessly sought the couple (or any one of them), chewed them and spat them out like yesterday's entree. I'm sure they're now very happy their mission is accomplished. Shameless vultures!
I feel so sad and sorry for the former lovebirds. They have been used and abused by the vultures to no end. When the SMS King was just crowned, the vultures had the cheek to reprimand, via scathing articles, CD pirates and finger-happy aspiring scribes who "used" and "exploited" the poor, ignorant boy.
Yet, day after day their own newspapers and tabloids ran pages after pages of stories about him, his likes, his dislikes, what he would eat, what he wouldn't eat, how many times he would fart, etc, no matter how silly or nonsensical the stories sounded.
Ironic.
Then, as they began to run out of things to write about the boy, they tracked those close to him. His family members became instant, reluctant celebrities. So did his fiancee. They hunted her down for interviews, photo shoots, comments, what-have-you.
When these too became stale news, they created new ones, linking the boy to other celebrities. Pages after pages of fishy business. All in the name of public interest, I'm sure.
So the poor girl in the kampung naturally got worried. The bastards who called themselves managers of the boy also did not help matters. The two did not communicate for five months due to the boy's busy schedule. So she came to see him, but was stood up a few times.
So, the vultures got a drift of this, too, and pursued and pecked, pursued and pecked, until what was very private became very public. And then the boy, not so bright to begin with, retaliated, after he himself was pursued and pecked. The rest, like they always say, is history.
So, I guess the girl, now labeled gila glamour by the very vultures who had sought her, would be dropped like a sack of potatoes. She's no longer somebody, she's yesterday's news. She's stale toast.
And the vultures? They will continue pursuing other busuk things to peck and pick on. It's what they do.
TO KONGSI, OR NOT TO KONGSI
A lot of people have said a lot of things over the statement made by the Perak Mufti a while ago that the Muslim Hari Raya ought not be jointly celebrated with people of other faiths as this could erode the faith of Muslims and lead to blasphemy.
In a truly Malaysian fashion, as soon as this was reported, hundreds of Som, Nik and Mary came forward to voice their two-sen opinion on the topic. It doesn't matter that most of them are quite clueless (read not quite an authority on Islam), but thanks to the equally clueless reporters, their misinformed views get air time and column inch, and contribute further to the confusion.
Granted that the Perak Mufti is not actually a person known for making PC statements (remember not too long ago he suggested that all HIV/AIDS patients be banished to some island?), I think that this particular topic needs to be looked at within the context within which it was made/meant to be discussed.
A lot of people (including me) do not really understand the concept of Hari Raya, and why Muslims celebrate it. Who can blame them? Hari Raya today has degenerated into a highly commercialised affair of excessive consumption, wastage and stupid TV entertainment. It has been almost totally stripped off its religious meaning.
Hari Raya Aidil Fitri is to mark the end of puasa, where Muslims must also pay the zakat fitrah. These two ibadah, part of the five rukun Islam, when performed correctly and with utmost sincerity, would "purify" the Muslims. The other Hari Raya, the Aidil Adha, is part of the haj ritual, another one of the rukun Islam, and has a lot to do with the concept of one-ness of Allah, often reminded through the story of sacrifice made by Nabi Ibrahim of his son Nabi Ismail.
So, basically, the two Hari Raya have a lot to do with the doctrine and rituals of Islam and the Muslim worship. Therefore, it doesn't make any sense to kongsi them with people of other faiths. It's the same with festivities of other religions, which should be respected but not neccesarily shared by every Malaysian.
I think it was in this context that the Perak Mufti was talking about. But then again, I could be wrong, sebab saya pun tak berapa arif bab ni.
As for kongsi makan during Hari Raya (and during all other festivities)? I'm all for it, as it has become what Malaysia Truly Asia is known for.
Right.
WE ARE A SENSITIVE LOT ... NOT
OK, more of the AF saga. Sorry, folks, I just have to do this, and get it out of my chest, otherwise I tak tidur lena (over!).
So, apologies over the dadah comment incident were asked and accepted -- well, it looked like they were accepted -- and we hope everyone will now bury the hatchet, along with other things that need burying, doping habits included.
I guess Astro now can take the credit for bringing the episode to a close, and hope that no one else would make any more controversial incendiary remarks, especially those that would offend the students, their parents, critics, guest artistes, etc. Right?
Wrong! I am still reeling from shock over the word "n_gg_r" uttered by the host when describing the different style or image adopted by each of the students during last weekend's concert. I almost fell off my sofa when I heard it. I couldn't believe my ears!
Yet no one has said anything. No one has screamed murder, no one has demanded a public apology, unlike over the dadah episode. Which goes to show that typical Melayu are only sensitive to criticisms yang kena batang hidung sendiri, no matter how true they are. Those that are sensitive and extremely offensive to people of other cultures, go to hell, we don't care. It also goes to show how ignorant we are as a bangsa.
I hope someone will make noise about this, louder than that made over the dadah comment. And demand that Astro and the AF host apologise to the whole world, or face a multi-million ringgit suit.
PROGRESS AND THE POLITE SOCIETY
Last Sunday, like millions of other (Malay) Malaysians, I parked myself in front of the telly to watch the weekly Akademi Fantasia 4 concert. Not so much by choice, but by default. Because when it comes to AF4 and the programme's twice-daily updates, my adik Wan rules. He takes over the house and conquers the remote control. So, macam rela terpaksa la ni.
As much as I want to be nonchalant about AF4, I have to admit that there are a couple of good talents in there -- particularly Farhan and Velvet. The rest is rather forgettable.
Anyway, what I'm about to rant next is already being discussed by satu Malaya. Yup, critic Adlin Aman Ramli and his frank and cutting comments, which spare no one. Not the "students", nor the "faculty members" of AF4. Not even the guest artistes.
Adlin has received a lot of flak it seems for his "stay away from drugs" advice given to one of AF4 favourites Faizal, after the latter finished his performance, which was accompanied by Saleem, once a great singer beleaguered with dadah problem. Some people think the "advice" was so un-called for as it was basically nothing more than a cheap shot meant for Saleem.
Now, no one knows for sure what Adlin's intention was. For all we know, he was just, well, giving advice to someone who he felt could have a future in the industry.
Me, the moment I heard Adlin, I went, "Yes!! Finally! Someone is saying something about this, and so strongly, too!" That's progress, I thought. I mean, sampai bila should we continue to be polite about the subject? Sampai bila are we to continue to give multiple second chances to dadah abusers?
Astro pun satu hal. What kind of signal is it giving to its mostly young viewers when it continues to give face/exposure to repeat dadah offenders? It's OK to take drugs, kids, if you're a pop star? No matter how many times you erred, we would always welcome you back because you're such a great singer? Tolonglah!
How many dadah abusers are there in the entertainment industry still idolised by millions? I can name a few. Ni yang saya tak paham ni. And why we are encouraging our youngsters to root for them, I also don't understand...
And then, when someone somewhere has enough guts/balls to say something, dia pulak yang kena marah. Tak sopan la, kurang ajar la, tak kena tempat la. Semuanya nak kena berlapik.
To me, it was so tak kena tempat on the part of Astro to have invited that particular dadah junkie, or any other drug offenders/addicts, to be on the show. Millions of ringgit is being spent by the government, NGOs, corporate sponsors and other bodies in the national fight against dadah. Yet, orang-orang yang hisap ganja, yang keluar masuk pusat serenti, yang keluar masuk mahkamah disebabkan dadah, these are the ones yang masih disanjung dan diusung ke sana ke sini. Nak kasi diorang peluang/ruang kedua.
Now, I'm not an incompassionate (is there such an adjective?) person. I am. If you do wrong, I'll give you a second chance to correct the wrong. But if keep repeating the offence macam ulang-tayang drama Melayu kat Astro, sori la beb, out you go, finish, bye bye.
MORE WASTAGE...
Anyone flipping through local newspapers today and yesterday would have noticed the full-page colour ad ran by "the Government and the People of the State of Selangor Darul Ehsan" thanking with "utmost sincerity" the Prime Minister for his working visit to the State on June 13.
The ad was carried by the English publications on June 13, and the Malay publications today, by what I saw. And today also, a Selangor State-owned company ran another ad thanking the Prime Minister for officially opening its herbatorium.
It looks like the State of Selangor has a lot of money. Those full-page colour ads cost anywhere from RM22,000.00 to RM41,000.00 each, depending on which paper carried it. The Star normally charges RM34,500.00, NST RM22,560.00, Berita Harian RM33,600.00 and Utusan Malaysia RM32,600. So, you do the Maths. (FYI, the most expensive rate is offered by Sin Chew Daily at RM40,800.00, although I don't think the State rented a page).
I remember not so long ago everybody (and by this I meant UMNO politicians) rallied around the move mooted by their higher-ups against this type of wastage, against unnecessary ass-kissing spending. So what happened?
I guess everyone now wants to show support to the PM, in many ways -- guided or otherwise -- following the recent developments between him and his predecessor. To me, the support could be given in so many other ways, some of which do not cost anything. Save the people's money for something more useful and constructive. I wonder how many of "the people of the State of Selangor Darul Ehsan" consented to have their money wasted that way.
While I'm on the subject, I know that a few days prior to the recent NAM meeting, DBKL spruced up a few of the city streets with flowering bunga tahi ayam and bunga balung ayam, and several other species not hardy enough for our sweltering climate. Now, three weeks later, they look so pathetic and I suppose DBKL has already directed its nurseries to replace these plants, again. More money wasted.
Kalau lah ada orang DBKL yang tersesat to this blog, I would like to suggest that you tell your higher-ups or your landscape "con"sultants to start considering hardier species, like pokok ati-ati, or any other hardy plants with those coloured or pigmented leaves. They are not only nice, but can withstand our weather better. They are also low-maintenance.
You might also tell them that whatever they had learned on their study visits to four-season countries might not work in our tropical setting.
STILL A NATIONAL AGENDA
Before anyone starts screaming murder, let me qualify that what follows is not a criticism against my own kaum. Instead, it is just an observation from an average Malaysian not quite familiar or learned about how certain agendas are supposed to work in his beloved country.
A few days ago, UMNO launched a one-stop agency set up to lend a helping hand to budding Malay entrepreneurs. It was named Gagasan Badan Ekonomi Melayu, or Gabem, for short.
The Prime Minister, who officiated the launch, was quoted by a local paper to have said: "Malays should help Malays and start a migration of the mind for a better life and to be more advanced. The struggle to strengthen the economy of the Malays is an economic mission that has to become a national mission and only after the (Malay) economy has been strengthened would the pride and honour of the Malays be more meaningful." He also said Malays must change their mindset and attitude to raise themselves to a higher level. "This can only be done when Malays adopt the approach of helping other Malays such as the rich helping the poor."
Right.
I looked up the word gagasan (which sounds like a big word to me) in a dictionary, which lists it to mean idea, plan, scheme, thought, reflection. So I did some reflecting of my own, wondering whether Gabem would really become a meaningful, implementable scheme or whether it would forever remain just an idea.
I don't know about you, but observation of past and current events tell me to place my bet on the latter. I live in a country where many ideas, policies, schemes etc have been put forward and implemented in the name of helping the less economically endowed ethnic majority. And Gabem is the latest.
The way I see it, such a gagasan would only serve a few people, and not the Malay masses and the riff raffs it is implied to assist. It would certainly make popular those young, impatient, power-hungry political leader-wannabes trying to endear and ingratiate themselves among the Malay masses. And if it does help, such a scheme would assist those few budding entrepreneurs to be more and more successful (ie make more money) only to lupa daratan and forget to be generous and share their wisdom, let alone their wealth, for the purpose of inspiring aspiring fellow entrepreneurs.
Let's face it. There has been, there is, a lot of those greedy kacang lupakan kulit types among our midst who are looking out only for themselves. Remember pre-1997/98 glory days? A handful of Malays were handpicked to run well-connected companies, in the name of helping the Malays. They made obscene amount of money. They shamelessly paraded their wealth, their lavish lifestyle, their (foreign) trophy wives. It seemed that this was all they did. The rich Malays helping the poor Malays? Na ah, no way. And their companies? Oh yeah, they ran them -- to the ground. And then they disappeared. In the end, there was no payback to no one.
As long as there are Malays with very narrow, self-serving agenda, no gagasan would ever work. So the dream of making the pride and honour of the Malays more meaningful (whatever that means) would just remain a dream.
I am a Malay. I come from very, very poor background. Our whole family -- particularly my mother -- worked hard, and honest, to get ourselves out of the poverty rut. We are not filthy rich now nor will we ever be. But the pride and honour we earned along the way mean more to us than any material wealth on earth.
NATIONAL TOILET SUMMIT? REALLY...
A couple of days ago a local newspaper published a report on the plan by the Housing & Local Government Ministry to add a whimsical touch when it revamps KL's notoriously nasty public urinals.
The report also carried pictures of some of the possible urinal designs, which include ones in the shape of musical instruments and others with an open mouth replete with painted red lips and a pink tongue. Another design features a clown's mouth. These urinals, the Ministry hopes, would help or teach Malaysians to keep their public pee and poo depositories clean.
Personally, I don't see how these so-called "quirky" urinals would help. I for one would feel so uncomfortable aiming into one of these I may just miss my target!
To me, the key to maintaining clean public toilets is in proper maintenance. So, the public funds could be better spent on user-friendly toilet features, like working built-in bidet sprays and auto flush systems. Add in a box of sanitiser, uninterrupted supply of toilet paper, liquid soap and paper towels, and you'll have a lot of happy campers in the loo.
And oh, don't forget to train the cleaners on proper toilet care. I mean, wet does not equal clean. Really.
It would also be a good idea to get rid of the archaic squat-type toilets once and for all. Do people use them anymore?
The newspaper report also mentioned that a National Toilet Summit is being planned for August at which Malaysians will be taught toilet etiquette and how to establish a clean toilet culture.
Wow. Do we really need a national summit for this? Well, on hindsight, I guess so. As embarassing as it may sound, a majority of our members of the public need to be toilet-trained. Some do not even understand the concept of flushing. What, they think once they deposited their poo, it'll just go away just like that?
But I suppose let's forgive their parents for not teaching them proper toilet manners. Now, equipped with what they'd learn at the Summit, let them redeem themselves by imparting toilet etiquette to their children.
And some day, we can all pee and poo in peace, happily ever after.
WHAT'S IN THE NAME, YOU SAY?
Call me ignorant, but I have just come across a series of electronic display products (stuff like plasma screen) manufactured locally and marketed under the brand name of MAL. It must have been around for a while. I guess the name was chosen by the brains behind it to reflect the country origin of the products, Malaysia.
In a way, I suppose I should feel proud that there are a lot of locally manufactured consumer products making their way to the export markets, brands like Elba, Khind, MEC, Pensonic etc. Some of these brands are positioning themselves as global brands (Khind's tagline is "A World Brand").
So, what is my problem, you ask. No, no problem. Not really. I have faith in these brands. I used to own a locally made cordless iron. It lasted more than four years until I dropped it too many times. Now I don't use it although it still functions. All three of my electrical fans are also local. Some of my other products carry foreign names, but are manufactured locally.
Jadi, apa dia? What is it, then? Well, I have an issue with the brand name MAL. "Mal" in French means "bad", or "not good", or "sick", or "evil" or "harm", or "wrong", or "pain". You get the picture. When a French person asks me how I am, I might say, "pas mal" (not bad), or "j'ai mal à la tête" (I have a headache).
In English, "mal" is a prefix meaning "bad" or "wrongful", as in "maltreatmeant" or "malfunction". Hardly something you'd want to associate with your brand, isn't it?
But then again, may be the brains behind MAL branded their products as such to prove a point. OK, let our products carry a brand name that means "bad", which could in itself attract customers, and when they buy and try out, they would discover that our products are in fact "good" and then they come back for more? Erm, now it is I who sound mal.
Other Malaysians butcher their products or brands using the French language in other ways. For example, the French preposition "de" has been misused and abused for as long as I could remember. You'd come across "De Bicycle Shoppe", or "De Village Resort", or its variation of "D'Village Resort", and a lot more. My all-time favourite is "Doris de Florist". I swear.
In French, "de" does not mean "the". Instead, it means "of" or "from". As in, le toit de la maison (the roof of the house), or il vient de Kuala Lumpur (he comes from Kuala Lumpur). It is also used to charaterise or measure something, as in un bébé de 10 mois (a 10-month-old baby), or 12 mois de travail (12 months' work). Also in questions or negative phrases, like, a-t-il de pommes? (does he have any apples?), or il n'a pas de pommes (he doesn't have any apples). Eh, I'm giving French lessons now, huh?
No, the point is, we should not embarass ourselves unnecessarily. Check first before we decide to come up with fancy names. The same goes for the authorities that approve the registration of these names. Jangan main OK aje.
PROPAGATING SUBSIDY/WELFARE MENTALITY
Recently, a politician (who else would it be) from an opposition party made noise via several newspaper reports announcing that he would take up to the government to approve in principle a motion that Petronas' profits "be distributed to the people, especially the needy".
This scares me a bit. Because there a lot (and I mean a lot) of people out there who are needy. Some are needy because they are really needy. A lot more are needy simply because they are greedy. Then there are those shameless, lazy lot who are always on the look-out for free hand-outs as their main source of income.
I'm also scared because after Petronas, which GLCs and other companies are going to be next? What kind of message are we sending to them? Don't do well because you will be punished for your success? What kind of message are we sending to investors?
More importantly, what kind of message are we sending to the masses and the riff raffs? That it's all right if you don't work hard in life because there are always companies like Petronas to help you out? That it's OK to waste time and resources on Akademi Fantasia, konsert-konsert hiburan and other lepak sessions? That it's OK to always depend on others to fill up your periuk nasi?
And I thought we wanted to do away with subsidy and welfare mentality, which, as long as it is propagated and sanctioned, will not help us move forward. There's no room for this in 2020's Malaysia.
I'm not an expert in economy (no kidding...) and I know very little about how the country is run (is it being run, really...?), but I think I would want to ask this particular politician to ask the government how it has been spending billions of ringgit companies like Petronas and other GLCs pay in taxes, dividends, royalties, etc.
Perhaps this particular politician should suggest to the government that hey, please set aside some money for programmes that will really help the needy and the riff raffs to develop their capability to help themselves and their brood better their miserable lives. Ajar diorang macamana nak memancing, jangan asyik dok kasi ikan kat diorang. Kita bukannya bangsa peminta sedekah...
REALITY FANTASISED
The good people at ASTRO recently introduced the 20 candidates shortlisted to try out as the 12 finalists for Akademi Fantasia 4. A lot of newspapers wrote about this, and carried the pictures of the kids. That means the reality programme will start soon.
The good people at ASTRO recently introduced the 20 candidates shortlisted to try out as the 12 finalists for Akademi Fantasia 4. A lot of newspapers wrote about this, and carried the pictures of the kids. That means the reality programme will start soon.
Yippee. I'm sure AF's die-hard fools can't wait to watch and part with their money to vote for their favourite candidates. A lot of poor fools will get poorer by the end of the season. And the sad part is, they don't realise that they are fools.
During the last season, I know of someone who spent as much as RM500 on SMS votes. Another person allocated about RM200 for each of her three children. And countless others I talked to were heavy voters as well. OKlah, if they have the money, why not, kan. People get satisfaction their own way.
Personally, though, I think this is extremely wasteful, not to mention stupid. What do you get in the end? Nothing. The only parties that gain would be the TV station, the SMS provider, and the candidates. And their hangers-on and users.
Yang memalukan most ialah, kebanyakan yang suka buang duit dan buang masa ni adalah orang-orang Melayu. Let there be some hiburan events, yang datang meramaikan majlis ialah orang-orang Melayu. Siap berkemah dan berkampung lagi. Bawak anak-anak sampai malam buta. Buang masa, buang duit. Yang masalahnya, diorang ni bukannya kaya sangat in the first place.
Yet, when prices of goods, petrol etc go up, they would be the first to cry murder. School fees go up, they complain. Prices of school books go up, they complain. But when it comes to hiburan, or Mawi, sanggup berkorban wang, jiwa dan raga. Orang Melayu.
I also read with disgust a couple of articles in this particular Malay tabloid. One of the 20 candidates wears a tudung. So the reporters wrote to suggest that she might have been selected by ASTRO because of her choice of attire. She could be popular because she could well be the female version of Mawi. So I suppose the would-be fool voters are supposed to forget that she could actually sing. And in another article, the same writers went so far as to suggest that this particular candidate could also win many votes because Mawi likes girls who wear tudung, and that she also might have all the qualities of a woman that Mawi idealises.
Aiyo. I am disgusted at the stupidity of it all. Of the articles. What were the reporters thinking? And their editors?
Personally, I feel that it's high time someone re-looked at the quality of journalism in this country. If we really want to educate our masses, please stop printing rubbish like these. They may be popular among the masses and the riff raff. But what's popular among them isn't necessarily good for them.
EDUCATING MALAYSIAN DRIVERS
Out of desperation to curb unnecessary ("unnecessary" is subjective here) road deaths, the government has come up with plans to educate would-be Malaysian drivers from young. Melentur buluh biarlah dari rebungnya.
I'm all for education. It's the most wonderful gift. It empowers people to aspire for something better, something higher. So, this move by the government ought to be received by all with open arms, and mind.
I hope in the proposed curriculum or module, they would be smart enough to include the following tips:
- Emergency lanes are for people to stop their vehicles in real emergencies, not for ciloking other vehicles.
- Hazard lights should be turned on only when vehicles are stationary, not when you're doing 60kmh during heavy rain.
- Slow pokes should drive on the left lane, and not hog the fast lane.
- Right/left indicators are not ornamental in purpose.
- Zebra crossings are meant for people to cross the road, so please stop when you see people crossing. They are never meant for zebras.
- Don't pack more than four (I've seen as many as seven) people in a Kancil.
Of course, like many other educational lessons, you tend to forget what you learn.
For this, I have a very simple solution. Stop selling cars to stupid people. Make them take a test or something, to prove that they're in fact have a bit of brain before they get to drive.
GOODBYE RIFF RAFF, HELLO WELL-HEELED
The last of the occupants of Flat Pekeliling have yet to leave the buildings, but the developers appointed to redevelop this 15ha prime land have already dished out their plans. Yes. Projek hartanah gaya mewah, named Taman Sari Riverside Garden City, will replace the decrepit flats.
The developers have ingeniously divided the area into 20 parcels, named Parcels A through Y, where starting this month different buildings and facilities will be erected. Yes, a lot of people will be turned on by the ka-ching sound the project will bring. Construction alone will cost RM3 billion, an amount that will give considerable staying power for many, no doubt. Yup. We just love erections, don't we?
There will be condominiums, townhouses, hotels, shopping complexes, service apartments, offices -- all come with the adjective mewah. I suppose the demand for luxury living and lifestyle is ever on the rise. So, get rid of the riff raff. Let them go stay in the backwoods of Setapak Jaya for all DBKL cares. Bring in the well-heeled. For the sake of the well-heeled, let's hope that the project will be completed. We don't want another eyesore in that area, like the all-suite office building that another developer started there almost a decade ago.
I hope DBKL has also included brilliant plans to ease traffic in that area, especially when construction starts. I can imagine the bottleneck that all rate and taxpayers like me have to go through everyday will get many times worse than it already is.
But hey, ka-ching rules, once again.
WASTAGE WASTAGE
I was in Johore over the Wesak Day weekend to attend a friend's wedding. Finally, the guy got hitched, much to the delight of his family, no doubt. I wish him and the wife well. As we were driving from Kluang to Mersing, where the wedding reception was held, I noticed an imposing house on a hill, with ornate fencing and well tended compound. "Oh, that's the DO's residence," my Johore-born and bred sister volunteered. Me, who was Kelantan-born and bred, thought the house was fit for at least a Menteri Besar. Definitely it was much, much better looking than the house of Kelantan's Menteri Besar.
"So much wastage we have in Johore," said my sister, gesturing now to a row of potted plants lining one of Kluang's thoroughfares. The money, she said, should have been spent elsewhere. Uhmm, I agreed, as my thought raced back to KL, where DBKL has also been on a city beautification drive for some time now. A lot of streets in the city have been "beautified" with potted plants, flower beds and hanging baskets.
They do make the streets look pleasant. But the thing is, DBKL chooses to use plants that probably last three to four weeks on most of its flower beds. After that, they die and would be replaced. It looks like DBKL needs a lot of money to keep replacing these plants. Which translates into ... wastage, and oh, how could I forget ... lucrative income for the contracted nurseries.
Why can't DBKL use more lasting perennials? Those that require less maintenance? I'm sure there are lots of other species in the contractors' nurseries that its landscape consultants could choose. Yup. Landscape consultants. There's such a profession, you know.
Use the money on more relevant stuff, lah. Like fixing up those potholes, providing more pedestrian-friendly side-walks, upgrading and maintaining public toilets. These are just a few examples.
Talk about landscaping, I used to enjoy driving south. I thought the NSE was one of the better-landscaped highways. All those mature trees and flowering plants that served as the divider of the opposing lanes were so cantik and colourful.
Not anymore. The owner-operator of the NSE is upgrading some stretches of the highway into three-lane carriageway, and has been uprooting and destroying all those wonderful trees and plants. What a shame. In their place, I assume, would be the cold metal barrier.
Personally, I don't think the upgrading is quite necessary. OK. May be at busy stretches near Senawang. But at the rest of the highways? No need, lah. Having three lanes per way would further confuse the already confused Malaysian drivers. As of now, they think that the middle lane is the slow lane, so they overtake using both the left lane and the fast lane. Besides, the left lane is almost always empty.
Logically speaking, having three lanes per way is also not very safe. I think when driving, it would be easier to predict the reaction of other drivers on a two-lane carriageway if something happens on one of the lanes. After all, you only have two lanes to negotiate. Kalau ada tiga lanes, macam tak berape sure nak pegi to which lane if something happens.
But hey, someone needs to make money. The work was sanctioned by the government. Ka-ching for the builders. I read the owner-operator issued bonds to raise fund to use for the upgrading work. Ka-ching for the financial institutions involved. And if there's an increase in toll charges once the upgrading is complete, ka-ching for the owner-operator. After that, it can go chink-chink champagne glasses with its sister company the builders.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY UMNO...OR NOT
UMNO celebrates its 60th anniversary today. I can image lots of my Malay brethren yippeeing about in Johore Baru. Yup, 100,000 or more people. That's a blessing. I'm not quite up to seeing that circus in KL.
Frankly, I think they should be reflecting more than celebrating. OK. So UMNO has done a lot for the Malay people. What it should be reflecting on now is how to move all the Melayus to the next century. And I'm not just talking physical here, but more on mental shift.
As a bangsa, as a nation, we somehow are moving. Backwards, that is. While others moved on to more important things in this globalised existence, we seem to be dealing more and more with issues that are so remeh-temeh they are laughable, if you're not a tax payer who expect value for my money like me.
People are becoming more narrow-minded, their views more myopic. Elected leaders are showing more and more of their moronic side that makes me wonder how and why they were elected in the first place. Ooops. I forgot. Money politics.
Personally, I would have loved to grow up and live during the days of my parents and their parents, when people were more tolerant, more open-minded, more intelligent, more honest, more real...
PUBLIC TOILETS AND THE PUBLIC
Today a local tabloid carried an article on the lack rubber (spray) hoses in the toilets of a leading shopping complex for people to wash their behinds (and private parts) after they finished doing their business. Wah. Big issue.
Today a local tabloid carried an article on the lack rubber (spray) hoses in the toilets of a leading shopping complex for people to wash their behinds (and private parts) after they finished doing their business. Wah. Big issue.
The article, taking up half a page, came complete with quotes from alleged patrons, all parroting the writer's sentiments. I wished I had been interviewed as well, for I would have given the writer a piece of my mind.
I mean, hello, rubber hoses? Where has the writer been? How many shopping complexes, hotels, conference centres and other higher-end places boast rubber hoses in their public rest rooms anymore?
Instead, most of these toilets now come with hygienic, clean, state-of-the-art "cleansing" system that doesn't involve hoses. As a Muslim myself, I prefer NOT to use toilets that have hoses, because they're usually wet and filthy. The hoses are never placed properly, most of the time they'd be on the wet floor or in the toilet bowls. And I'm expected to USE them? I won't touch them with a ten-foot pole, thank you very much.
The particular shopping complex the writer was ranting about, its toilets are among the cleanest. Its toilet seats are clean, the floor mopped dry (and I mean dry, NOT damp) every few minutes, the flush works, and the built-in water spray is so easy to use. It's much more convenient than a rubber hose, or any other types of spray. They also almost never run out of tissue paper, and each stall is installed with a sanitiser box.
Tolonglah. We are not talking about some backwater rest-stops, here. It's time that the Press did their part to try bring our riff raff masses into the twenty-first century.
And the rubber hose? Leave it at home. Someone may need it to water the plants, or wash the porch, or both.
Ours is becoming really a classless society. No, not the type advocated by Marx -- we all know what DID NOT happen with communism. I'm talking about a society whose members are ditching all social norms, values and etiquette, about people who have no manners and are just plain rude. People yang takde kelas.... And they could be anyone, anywhere. From the average riff-raff in the streets to elected politicians sitting in parliament. From sports figures on the courts to corporate hotshots in the boardrooms. They are everywhere. And this worries me, and should worry you, too. The moment the government started its budi bahasa budaya kita campaign, we should have had a collective seizure of massive, epileptic proportions.
What's happening? Weren't we supposed to be a people steeped in kesopananan and kesusilaan, so rich with budi bahasa and pekerti mulia? Whether we are Melayu, Cina, India, or Lain-Lain -- we all clung (or at least our parents and their parents, and the parents of their parents, did) to a set of values that shape and define who we are and how we interact with other people. So kenape sekarang semua orang kurang ajar? People are rude on the road, people rude at the food stalls, people are rude in the office, people are rude, period.
I wonder what parents are teaching their kids nowadays. Not much, I suppose. Especially when the parents themselves are not the best of examples. Most are too busy or too ignorant to care. And they keep breeding. Rabbits after rude rabbits. 
Over the Labour Day weekend, I went to Penang -- you know, the so-called Pearl of the Orient (although personally I think the lustre has long gone) -- for a wedding. The last time I toured the island (short nasi kandar-makan stops don't count) was 13 years ago, so I looked so much forward to the trip. Besides the makan-makan, which my traveling companion really relished in, there were lots of other things and places to do and see. All in all, it was rather enjoyable. Until I did a bit of post-trip accounting, that is. Food and lodging aside, fuel and toll charges took a big bite out of my traveling budget. No wonder a lot of my friends say they can't really afford to cuti-cuti Malaysia. Especially now when petrol prices are what they are. Coupled that with the toll charges, my kocek is now so kosong I have to suppress those nasi kandar urges so that I won't go binge at any of the cut-throat, second-rate outlets we have in KL.
Talk about petrol, I wasted a lot of it when that fuel-guzzler of mine got stuck in traffic due to some demonstration over fuel price hike. OK la, to protest is good, I suppose, after all we should all root for the freedom of expression, and this is a free country, relatively speaking. So, I just parked my vehicle on the road side, and watched the demonstrators. One thing struck me, though. I wasn't clear whether they were protesting against the government or Petronas. To me, if protestors want to protest, they have to make sure that they're protesting against the right party. This way, they would get their issues and messages right. Otherwise, the issues and messages will bercampur-aduk and will confuse people more. I'm all for the freedom of expression, but I'm also for taking accountability for what you say. We can't all be like politicians. Some of us have to be responsible, so tak elok cakap sesuka hati without getting our basic facts right.
A lot of people marah-marah because fuel prices went up, and a lot were also angry at Petronas. Mana pegi keuntungan Petronas? What happens to Petronas' money? Why can't Petronas subsidise prices? Watching the protestors that day, I think a lot of people missed the point. What people should be asking is: What is being done with the billions of ringgit Petronas has paid to the government in royalty, dividend, tax, and export duty? Kalau baca Press reports, last year alone Petronas paid RM31 billion to the government, more than half of its operating profit. Yang Petronas dah bayar sejak 1974, was close to RM250 billion. So apa yang telah dibuat with all the money?
To me, don't ask what happens to Petronas' profits, because the money the company makes is for the company to keep for its business expansion, for technology acquisition, for capacity/capability building etc. After all, Petronas IS a company, governed by all the rules and regulations, just like any other company, kan? The company already paid what is due to the government. What the government does with this money, this is what I want to know.
Hish, kalau betul la apa yang newspapers cakap, I wonder mana pegi RM31 billion tahun lepas? Mana pegi RM250 billion yang dah dibayar since 1974? Kalau la sebegini banyak, kenapa must I still pay income tax????So, my suggestion is: leave Petronas alone, la. Kalau nak sangat tahu how much the company makes, check out its website. Ask for its annual report. It does publish annual reports, audited some more, so don't say the company is not transparent.
The not-so-transparent party, I feel, is the government. I also want to know what it does with all those billions...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)